Karate Calamity
A strange thing happened today. Tonight is one of the nights I usually take Ben to his karate class. He’s been taking these classes for about 18 months now and just loves it. Karen and I were very happy to find this particular school with this particular sensei.
You see, Ben is not one for extracurricular activities. He’s not very sports-oriented and really hates any type of team sport because he lacks the coordination and gets frustrated very easily. We were happy when he agreed to try karate since we explained to him that he could learn at his own pace and he wasn’t really competing with anyone.
So Karen phoned around to different schools and found this one. What drew Karen to this particular school was her chat with the sensei. His approach was different from other schools. First of all, his curriculum for children is designed for children, not adapted from an adult curriculum. He also takes the approach of rewarding good behaviour instead of punishing bad behaviour – he feels that kids want attention and if he gives the attention to the kids who exhibit good behaviour, then the kids who don’t will change the way they act to get the attention too (it works).
The other thing that makes him a really good teacher is he gets to know each and every one of the kids and adapts his style to teach the kids in the way that reaches them the best. In Ben’s case, it is through using humour. If Ben is frustrated or overwhelmed by a task, no amount of commiserating, cajoling, or any other type of empathetic, coercive, or forceful response will motivate him. No, the way around Ben’s mental blocks is humour. Joke about the situation, mock it – or even him – in a fun way, just find any way to add humour to the situation and Ben will respond. This sensei grasped that right from the start and it’s one of the reasons Ben has done so well.
Back to the present – I took Ben to his class tonight and the dojo was locked. I wasn’t too concerned as this happens sometimes due to illness or other unforeseen circumstances. As we were heading back to the car, Ben’s sensei drove up. He told me he had something for me and asked me to follow him to the dojo. He did not seem well. He wasn’t his usual self.
When we got into the dojo, the place looked like it had been cleaned out. My heart sank. He handed me a letter which started off by saying that his accountant had made mistakes in his books and that the accountant, the karate business, and even his personal assets were being audited by the government. Because of this, he could not make the rent on his dojo and the school is shut for the time being.
Now I knew why he looked miserable. This is a person with high ethical values and integrity who teaches this to his students. He must be devastated to find that the government has found irregularities with his books.
I stayed and talked with him for a while. He is determined to get the school up and running again. He told me that he could either go on or quit and he feels that if he quits it will be going against everything that he has taught his students over the years.
He’s hoping to have a temporary facility lined up within a few weeks and start teaching again, albeit with a scaled-down schedule. Whenever he starts again, Ben will be there.
He told me that he feels that every challenge in life is a lesson that must be learned. Unless you learn that lesson, the challenges will continue to repeat themselves until you learn it. He’s had an up and down ride this year. He outgrew his original dojo at the beginning of the year. He negotiated with his landlord to move to the next unit over since it was about three times the size. Then, just as he moved in, he found out that the landlord leased his old unit to an adult video store. Well, he wasn’t going to have kids running back and forth in the evenings between the parking lot and that type of store, so he moved again only a month after taking the new unit.
I really hope things work out. He is a good person and he really does care for each of the kids he teaches.
You see, Ben is not one for extracurricular activities. He’s not very sports-oriented and really hates any type of team sport because he lacks the coordination and gets frustrated very easily. We were happy when he agreed to try karate since we explained to him that he could learn at his own pace and he wasn’t really competing with anyone.
So Karen phoned around to different schools and found this one. What drew Karen to this particular school was her chat with the sensei. His approach was different from other schools. First of all, his curriculum for children is designed for children, not adapted from an adult curriculum. He also takes the approach of rewarding good behaviour instead of punishing bad behaviour – he feels that kids want attention and if he gives the attention to the kids who exhibit good behaviour, then the kids who don’t will change the way they act to get the attention too (it works).
The other thing that makes him a really good teacher is he gets to know each and every one of the kids and adapts his style to teach the kids in the way that reaches them the best. In Ben’s case, it is through using humour. If Ben is frustrated or overwhelmed by a task, no amount of commiserating, cajoling, or any other type of empathetic, coercive, or forceful response will motivate him. No, the way around Ben’s mental blocks is humour. Joke about the situation, mock it – or even him – in a fun way, just find any way to add humour to the situation and Ben will respond. This sensei grasped that right from the start and it’s one of the reasons Ben has done so well.
Back to the present – I took Ben to his class tonight and the dojo was locked. I wasn’t too concerned as this happens sometimes due to illness or other unforeseen circumstances. As we were heading back to the car, Ben’s sensei drove up. He told me he had something for me and asked me to follow him to the dojo. He did not seem well. He wasn’t his usual self.
When we got into the dojo, the place looked like it had been cleaned out. My heart sank. He handed me a letter which started off by saying that his accountant had made mistakes in his books and that the accountant, the karate business, and even his personal assets were being audited by the government. Because of this, he could not make the rent on his dojo and the school is shut for the time being.
Now I knew why he looked miserable. This is a person with high ethical values and integrity who teaches this to his students. He must be devastated to find that the government has found irregularities with his books.
I stayed and talked with him for a while. He is determined to get the school up and running again. He told me that he could either go on or quit and he feels that if he quits it will be going against everything that he has taught his students over the years.
He’s hoping to have a temporary facility lined up within a few weeks and start teaching again, albeit with a scaled-down schedule. Whenever he starts again, Ben will be there.
He told me that he feels that every challenge in life is a lesson that must be learned. Unless you learn that lesson, the challenges will continue to repeat themselves until you learn it. He’s had an up and down ride this year. He outgrew his original dojo at the beginning of the year. He negotiated with his landlord to move to the next unit over since it was about three times the size. Then, just as he moved in, he found out that the landlord leased his old unit to an adult video store. Well, he wasn’t going to have kids running back and forth in the evenings between the parking lot and that type of store, so he moved again only a month after taking the new unit.
I really hope things work out. He is a good person and he really does care for each of the kids he teaches.
posted by Mike at 10:50 p.m.
2 Comments:
Sound frustrating. I hope things work out so that Ben can go back to class. Its so important when you find some one who can relate to your child.
Sensei is lucky to have such loyal parents as you and Karen supporting him in this. I hope things get resolved soon. As I said on Karen's blog, I know what a difference a good sensei can make, Master Choi is as much a friend as a sensei to my father.
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